Choke by Chuck Palahniuk

“If you’re going to read this, don’t bother.
After a couple pages, you won’t want to be here. So forget it. Go away. Get out while you’re still in one piece.
Save yourself.

What happens here is first going to piss you off. After that it just gets worse and worse.”

I always feel a little stupid reviewing a Chuck Palahniuk book, because it always seems like a futile effort. Especially with Choke, which opens with the above quote. How can you review a book like that? If you like it, you’re an idiot who’s too easily amused, and if you hate it, Chuck Palahniuk is just laughing at you, saying, “Dude, I told you.” You can’t win.

Chuck Palahniuk seems like the type of author who thrives on negative responses. The man’s probably wallpapered his bathroom with all the reviews trashing his books, and every morning he looks at them and cackles maniacally while he takes a shit. He doesn’t write books for entertainment, or to make you think, or to (god forbid!) preach a moral or a message. Chuck Palahniuk is that kid on the playground who dug up bugs and shoved them in girls’ faces just to see them run away screaming. His goal is to offend people, shock them, and just plain gross them out. Not much else.

Choke is a little more disgusting than Fight Club, and much, much less disgusting than Palahniuk’s 2006 novel Haunted. Take that however you like.

So why am I giving this book four stars?
Good question. I’m kind of wondering that myself.

I liked this book because I was supposed to hate it.

Verdict: four out of five stars

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